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Heat the milk till it is warm to touch (110°F). Take half cup milk and mix in 1 Tbsp of sugar. Sprinkle the yeast on top and set aside for 5 to 10 minutes. The yeast should become active and froth up .
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Reserve about 2 C of flour (200g) and place the rest in a large mixing bowl. Add the salt and stir well. Make a well in the center of the flour and add the yeast mixture followed by the eggs. Mix the eggs and yeast with a spoon and slowly start to mix in the flour. Add the remaining milk a little at a time and keep stirring with the spoon until all the flour is wet.
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Add the softened butter and sugar and start kneading. The dough will be very sticky. As you knead add the reserved flour a little at a time until the dough is no longer sticky. Keep kneading for about 15 minutes. The dough should be soft and pliable. Form into a ball and place in a large greased bowl. Cover and let it rise for 1 to 1 1/2 hours till it has doubled.
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If using the raisins, place it in a bowl and pour the cognac/rum on top. Let these soak till ready to use. Squeeze out the excess alcohol out just before adding to the dough.
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Punch down the dough and divide into 2. If planning to add nuts/ dried fruits knead those in now. Form each section into 3 ropes of similar size and make a 3 strand braid. Place each braid in a 9 inch loaf pan and let rise for 30 minutes.
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Preheat the oven to 350°F(175°C). Break the egg for the egg wash into a bowl and add 2 tsp water. Beat well. Brush the egg wash on top of the risen loaves. Sprinkle the coarse/nib sugar on top , if desired. Place the loaves in the preheated oven and bake for 30 to 40 minutes or till done(see notes).
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Cool in pan for 10 minutes. Transfer to a cooling rack and cool completely.